Dating in Melbourne 4 – All the single ladies

So being single is 90% awesome and 10% shit. I can do what I want, when I want, with who I want and how I want. I can stay out all night or stay in my pyjamas all weekend. I don’t have to worry about keeping a list of food my partner doesn’t eat, do two people’s washing or deal with someone else’s family stuff. It’s great. In a way it’s a load off my mind and it’s a total novelty. The other day I sat in my trackies drinking beers and cleaning out my room. I had (soy) icecream for dinner, put posters of hotties on my wall and listened to trashy music. Bliss.

But I have my days of not loving it too. Days when I miss my ex so badly that I just want to sit at my desk at work at cry, or worse, drink myself to sleep. That’s why I know I need to be single and let time heal my wounds. As a single girl I get plenty of attention and I know if I was ready for a relationship there would be plenty of options, just not necessarily ones I’d want to take!

When you’re single you need to learn to be by yourself and enjoy your own company. Be independent. Getting over a break-up from a long-term relationship is hard, especially one you thought would last forever. Get the girls together, have some drinks, go clubbing, have dinner parties, go to the beach, do whatever makes you happy and keeps you busy. Fill up your calendar with social events, personal training/gym work outs, family time and pamper sessions to keep you happy, make you feel loved and confident and go and do all the things you didn’t do because you were in a relationship. It doesn’t make it easier but it sure stops you thinking about it so much and even when you miss someone with all of your heart, ‘out of sight, out of mind’ sure rings true.

My best advice is to give each other space; block each other on Facebook and all other social media, delete the SMS and the emails, have a break from each other’s (and mutual) friends and keep out of each others way for a while. You won’t be friends straight away, if at all, so don’t even try because it only end up in tears. If you do see each other try to avoid the influence of alcohol or anything else because emotions will get out of control.

So I say to all the single ladies, put your hands up and make the most of being single. Don’t just from relationship to relationship, instead make sure you can be happy alone and never have unfinished business because if you lost someone as amazing as I did, you want to be damn sure it doesn’t happen again.

Stage 1 – MISERY
You’re shattered, grieving and an emotional wreck. Icecream, chocolate, best friends, wine,  DVDs, tracksuit pants, tissues and tears will be your arsenal.
Stage 2 – DISTRACTION
You’re angry and upset and wanting to show them what they’re missing. New hair, tan, shoes, dress, smashing the gym, spring cleaning, keeping busy and having space, will get you back on your feet.
Stage 3 – CATHARSIS
You’re moving on, but not there yet. Get your hot ass out there and meet new people, have alone time, get new hobbies and find your happiness.

If there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s when you’re happy being single and are true to yourself, someone wonderful comes along when you least expect it. For the first time in my life I’m being single and getting over someone without having another person to distract myself with. It’s the toughest experience ever and I know I won’t be able to fall in love with anyone else until I am over it, but I know that when I do, it’s going to be magic.

Friday Night Drinks – Edition 3

I’m surprised it’s taken me this long to write about my favourite bar, Cabinet Bar & Balcony. Apart from the great staff, the deck overlooking Swanston Street and the amazing cocktails named after regular customers [try the Ceri Colada and let me know what you think ;)], they have a daily Happy Hour from 5:30-6:30pm [$3 tap beer and $5 house wines] and all day on Tuesdays, as well as a $10 Flatbread frenzy Wednesdays from 6:00-8:00pm.  I love this bar so much that I have taken all my friends there, we’ve all had birthdays there, after work drinks happen frequently, we’ve had Tuesday lunches, Sunday afternoon ciders, post-Yum Cha drinks, taken dates there, met new people, had Tweet-ups there and now I’ve managed to book my office Christmas lunch there. Winnah!

But I finally had my resolve not to write about Cabinet broken when they announced that they’re going to be having a special New Years Eve event. Oh drat. Instead of having a special event where you pay $100 or more to get in and have limited drinks included (some venues are halting included drinks at midnight!) and are locked in all night, the switched-on staff at Cabinet have decided to have two shifts instead: the pre-fireworks crowd and the party crowd and I would definitely recommend that you book if you’re planning on having dinner before the show. If you’re on your way out somewhere and want to warm up or haven’t quite decided and want to start somewhere central than Cabinet is going to be perfect! I have friends coming down from Sydney and they want to check out the city before heading out to a house party so guess where we’ll be…

I first started crushing on Cabinet when one of my friends started working there and I came in to visit. The staff are all so friendly, talented and really good at remembering people, drinks and how to party themselves. When I realised I had a usual order which I hadn’t verbalised in weeks, I knew I was in love. Not to mention they look after their customers really well with excellent table service, regular water top-ups and knowing just the right time to ask if you need a top-up or a bowl of fries (and they are goooood fries).

My usual order is just the house red, as they don’t just have a crappy bulk buy for their house wines. I’ve switched over to the house rose for Summer but they also have my favourite beers, Kirin & Little Creatures Bright Ale as well as their Pipsqueak cider. The cocktail named after me is called the Ceri Colada and it has Havana rum, pineapple, coconut syrup & chocolate liqueur with a rim of dessicated coconut. It is heaven. Flatbreads are divine; tomato, boconccini, vasil & pesto is my favourite, my friends love the Cajuan chicken, mango & aoili or smoked salmon, cream cheese & capers ones as well. The bruschetta tasting plate is awesome, so are the spiced cashews (sooo moreish)  and there are still plenty of menu items that I haven’t gotten around to eating but make my mouth water, like the European picnic or the chocolate fondue…

Stuff people say about Cabinet:
Host Alan Bell [is] one of the city’s friendliest and most talented bartenders – CitySearch Melbourne
Your home away from home – That’s Melbourne and several other places!
Food ‘you always wished your mum would make’ – CitySearch Melbourne
http://www.cabinetbar.com.au – 11 Rainbow Alley, Melbourne. Near the corner of Swanston & Lt Collins.

Cabinet is sadly, not open on Mondays when I feel I most need it, but they’re open from noon every other day during the week, from 4pm on Saturdays and 2pm on Sundays. I feel like that’s not nearly enough for me.

Fresh Food Fast

You’ve just finished work, been at the gym and arrived home exhausted and really CBF cooking. The takeaway shop is looking pretty good and there’s a little devil on your shoulder telling you, “Go for it, you’ve earned it, working so hard and doing exercise. Indulge!” Well I’m the little angel on the other shoulder saying, “You’ve worked so hard, why ruin it by eating takeaway? Instead refuel with something healthy!” I know full well how easy it is to make a jaffle when you get home, or pick up something on the way. But I also know that health and weight loss do not go hand in hand with convenience foods. So what the hell can you eat with a clear conscience when you’re famished at the end of the day? Doesn’t take a genius to work out Maccas is no good for you.

Frozen vegies make a great base for a meal. Chuck in some protein like tofu or chicken/fish if you eat meat and then throw a little bit of flavouring in and instant stirfry! You can also cook them in a little bit of stock and then blend it for instant vegetable soup, add them to a store-bought meal or throw them in with pasta and pesto for instant Primavera. Sweet as. You can bulk out anything with frozen vegies, if you’re poor it’s genius. Everyone needs to eat more vegies anyway.

Real TV dinners can be made in old takeaway containers filled with leftovers from other meals. If you know you’re going to be getting home late just put one in the fridge to defrost during the day and then heat it up when you get home. It’s cheap, it’s easy and since you’ve eaten it before, you know you like it! Just make double when you do have time and pop one in the fridge/freezer for next time.

Salad is probably not the most hearty thing in the world when you’re starving but once you’ve eaten it and it’s had time to settle, you’ll be able to gauge how much hungrier you are, if at all. Start with one of those mixed leaf bags, put it in a bowl with cherry tomatoes, sliced capsicum, cucumber and then chuck in a bit of dressing and something like protein like beans/tofu cubes/low-fat cheese cubes/shredded BBQ chicken/smoked salmon/lamb strips and you’re sorted.

Healthy fast-food is always going to be a little bit of an oxymoron but when we have such good options as Nandos (try their chicken garden salad or chicken/veg pita/wrap), Subway (anything with heaps of salad and NO meatballs), Sushi Sushi, Sumo Salad or even just grabbing a salad bag from the lettuce section at the supermarket and if you want, a can of 5 bean mix or a BBQ chicken, is meal enough for two and only takes pulling it apart and putting it in a bowl. If you’re really lucky then you might live close enough to a vegetarian takeaway or somewhere that has vegie options. Get one, split it in two, have one half and save the other half for next time.

 

If you’re a little bit more motivated then grab a fish fillet, chicken breast, small piece of lamb, or tofu and marinate it for 15 minutes in your chosen sauce (try honey soy for chicken, thai/teriyaki for fish, sweet chilli for tofu and Moroccan/Greek for lamb) and then grill it. While it’s cooking, steam/microwave some frozen vegetables and if you’re really hungry, get one of those 90 second rice sachets and microwave that too. When it’s all ready, put half away in one of those takeaway containers for next time you’re in a hurry, or tomorrow’s lunch. Enjoy!

So yeah, it might take a little bit more effort that you’re really keen on but with all of the awesome options available out there you’d have to me pretty damn lazy to give up and get takeaway. If you’re really struggling to stay on track then go to http://www.liteneasy.com.au and order a pack of their frozen dinners. You can choose anything from schnitzel, roast dinner, curry, stirfry, pastas, seafood and so on. They take less than 10 minutes in the microwave and weigh in at around 400 calories. They’re higher in salt that I’d normally advise eating but it beats the Maccas run, that’s for sure.

Welcome to Miami

There’s something going on lately with Fashion and it’s a little unsettling. The truth is, some of the trends for Summer this year are shit and others are, well, not shit. It’s pretty amazing actually because having studied Fashion for three years and  gone to many shows over the last six, not to mention spent probably thousands of dollars on magazines… I kind of have an idea about what works and what doesn’t. Not sure the people who make the decisions do, however.
Tights/leggings as pants, for example, don’t work.

So the overall trend at the moment is for colour, such as you would find down at Miami beach and perfect so the festival season. But we’re talking a wide scope of stuff that has the potential to be a bit iffy. The stuff that I am loving a the moment pretty much encompasses fedoras, coloured wayfarers, the colour coral, gathered yet shapely summer dresses, short shorts, printed white tank tops, gladiator sandals, metallic prints on blacks, the rocker chick look for night time and so on…

How are these outfits not completely adorable!? I would wear any of them to the beach, festivals, BBQs and anything else in the hot weather. Over an awesome bikini but they’re pretty hard to find at the moment too…

I am also loving the revival of the little black dress. I almost feel like a fraud wearing black in Melbourne because to really make a point by wearing black, you need to not fit in with every goddamned other person in the city. Sportsgirl of all places has the most gorgeous range of LBDs by Rachel Gilbert except they’re like $250-350. Boooooo. Nicola Finetti has some great ones at MYER for under $180.

Must haves for this Summer:
A fedora – straw or otherwise, just get one.
Wayfarers – black or coloured, but only if the style suits you, no one likes a faker
A few cotton dresses with stringy straps, gathers, ruffles, etc.
Denim shorts- the better the legs the shorter the shorts and vice versa
Anything in coral (if it’s your colour), or blue/turquoise
Printed white singlets and t-shirts, and metallic printed black t-shirts/singlets as well
One or two decent LBDs for night and one for day
Gladiator sandals for day, wedges for night
A canvas beachbag for day and a black over the shoulder handbg for night.
Chunky bracelets/cuffs – metallic for night
A bikini in a classic or retro cut with a basic geometric or natural animal print, like polka dots, stripes or leopard.

The things that aren’t working right now are the neon prints, pantsuits, playsuits, all the eighties stuff coming back yet again, loose racerback singlets, bandeau tops/boob tubes, tie dye, crop tops, too many florals and the ghastly neon animal prints. High waisted shorts look bad on most people. My friend who studies fashion and works in the industry was once busted wearing a leotard and high waisted loose, tapered eighties pants with thick rimmed glasses and a topknot… so obviously the people in Fashion aren’t exactly the ones in the know all the time. Like that Linday Lohan Ungaro career-wrecker, for example… FAIL.

Bikini Body Challenge – She’s a groupie

So as part of the Bikini Body Challenge, I set myself the task of doing as many different group classes at the gym as possible. A lot harder when you work full-time but nonetheless, there’s a great variety and it sure beats using the cross-trainer for an hour staring at the TV. So I took myself to the gym most days for a fortnight and now I’ve done: Pilates, BodyAttack, Abs Blitz, BodyStep, BodyPump, Boxing Circuit, Cycle, Yoga, THT, BodyBalance and BodyCombat. I did not make it to BodyJam, the Dance class or to Pilates Reformer. All of the Body* classes are Les Mills brand (www.lesmills.com.au) and have a specific format which is kind of interesting but the class does go quite quickly! So this is what was fun and what sucked…

BodyPump is a workout using weights like a barbell or lifting bar and the Step platform, at your own level and your whole body aches the next day from squats, lunges and essentially all-over toning. Which is great, but I put on muscle really quickly and it makes me really paranoid. Poledancing is the only weight workout I’m really comfortable with and it’s my own body weight. Apparently BodyPump burns 600 calories per class though, so since I know that I’m probably more likely to go again and just avoid using the weights as much as possible. Some people were pretty buff but not slender and it was kind of scary for an aerobics class.

BodyStep uses a height-adjustable step and “simple movements on, over and around the step”. My freaking arse! It was hard and everyone else seemed to get the idea quickly but obviously a newcomer was going to have to get used to the movements and I’m really not very coordinated. Having a chunky instructor kinda freaked me out but I sweated my arse off, so I felt like I’d had a good workout. For those easily discouraged, stay at the back of the class until you learn the steps.

BodyBalance is not really a workout so much a a meditation/easy listening fan’s exercise and it really cemented my idea that my Mum going to BodyBalance once a week as her exercise program doesn’t do shit. If you’re a stress-head this class might actually help you clam down and breathe and all of that but I had to go for a run afterwards because I felt like I’d wasted a trip to the gym. Never again. Namby pampy stuff in my opinion.

I was kind of pissed off that I didn’t get to go to BodyJam because being the aforementioned uncoordinated person, I thought it might actually help improve my dance skillz0rz. I might make it one day but it’s only on Tuesday & Friday mornings at my gym and I’m at work then. Alas, I am doomed to be a dance-floor loser for life.

BodyCombat on the other hand is a pretty masculine group fitness class and I was sore, tired and full of testosterone when I left. Not so good at remembering the movements but the repetitiveness made it a little bit easier. I don’t like partnering up though, so that part of the class kind of sucked. Might give this one another go, because I definitely thought it was a good workout. Probably in my top three calorie burners I think, and it’s totally guy-friendly.

I’m glad I hadn’t read a bit more about BodyAttack before I did it as the “sports-inspired cardio workout for building strength and stamina” would probably not have been up my alley. Lucky I didn’t though because it was probably it most fun I’ve had working out in ages. Apart form being a massive calorie burner, the class was full of Happy Hardcore, bizarre motivational Engrish from the instructor and his Karaoke renditions during routines, which had me cracking up the whole class and made for my favourite Group Class experience. Obviously a class for the body-concious as well because there wasn’t a single person in the class who was overweight and there were a few girls who I probably wouldn’t let into my gym more than every second day if I was the owner, they were tiny. Clearly the class for weight loss.

As much as I really wanted to love Boxing Circuit and be addicted to it and throw punches and get sweaty and all of that hot Christina Aguilera Dirrty imagery, I just wasn’t into it. There was pain, sort of, but mainly boredom. I had a sparring (is it called that in boxing too?) partner who knew what she was doing and had her own gear and stuff which really helped. She was great and I was almost tempted to come back because she was so enthusiastic. Basically there was too much technique needed and the fun level wasn’t high enough for me to commit.

So Pilates is the class that I think is really easy and not a good workout at all because my core strength is pretty good from Poledancing. Then the next day I hurt all around my abs, obliques and all those core muscles. Then the next day after that, I can barely move. So I know it’s awesome and the more you do it the better you get. I had a different instructor than the previous time I’d done Pilates and they were heaps better with monitoring technique and not making me feel like I should be on a Macrobiotic diet and only wearing organic cotton or some shit. Or a ballerina.

If you don’t like doing sit-ups/crunches/etc then don’t do AbsBlitz. Even though it makes you think it will be a piece of piss because it’s only half an hour, you’ll be grossly surprised. I was going to do Pilates afterward and I could barely move after half an hour even with my decent abs-strength. Half an hour is plenty, there were more guys than girls in the class and the results were clear. Hardcore.

Speaking of Abs, THT (Tummy Hips Thighs) was another massive Abs workout. Using the fit ball and other props as well as resistance work, squats, planks and all of your favourite moves (not). The Les Mills classes are structured really well and seem to go a lot faster than the stuff like THT. Definitely hurt a little bit the next day but I just wasn’t really in the zone for this one.

The surprise, however, was Cycle, known in some gyms as Spin or RPM. What sounds more boring than a room full of stationary bikes with people pedaling away all together on an imaginary course? Well, actually, between an instructor who was lovely and supportive as well as realistic and the ability to really control the tension and therefore the difficulty, I had no problem working up a massive sweat in what seemed like no time at all. You could almost call me a Cycle convert but I haven’t been back again yet.

Yoga was so-so. Obviously I like to work, not just sit there stretching while someone tries to tell me how to breathe, but I did feel a bit more limber afterwards. Probably helped that I preempted the feeling of not working out that I got from BodyBalance and ran before rather than after. I kind of enjoyed Yoga more when me and my old housemate were doing it on the WiiFit though, but I might go again just to try and build up my flexibility when I can’t be arsed doing Pilates (read: don’t want to hurt the next day). Kind of want to do Bikram Yoga though, the sweaty one!

So my favourites were definitely Cycle and BodyAttack and maybe a couple of the others will get another chance from me like BodyStep. Just from watching while I was waiting for Boxing, the Dance class… it looked amazing and they even did the Thriller dance at the end. Inspiring! So at the end of it I’m feeling pretty good about my body after all my hard work, I still have a couple of weeks left on the challenge and have found a few classes that will help me break up my gym routine. I call that a success!

Bottling it up

I try to drink 2 litres of water a day. I don’t really drink juice, soft drinks, coffee (anymore, really), milk drinks or anything other than black or green tea or water (we’re not counting alcohol here, okay?) but I’ve also been notoriously bad at drinking water in the past. Since I work at a Health Organisation we have Neverfail tanks delivered to our office and most of us drink plenty. I have since discovered that if you drink 2 litres of water a day you need to go to the bathroom a lot more than you would like. I have also realised that paying $3.50 for a bottle of water is a total crock of shit. Even if it’s designer water like Another Bloody Water, Fiji or Evian. However, carrying a bottle around and reusing it raises a few questions about the chemicals from the plastic, the bacteria that linger from reusing bottles without thoroughly cleaning them and then if you don’t reuse, how much plastic is going to landfill/recycling.

But whilst I am really keen to recycle as much as possible, I am a total water snob. But by that I mean, I don’t like carrying around dorky plastic drink bottles but I do reuse the 1L bottles that I sometimes purchase from the supermarket. I will drink tap water, filtered water or watercooler water though.  I used to only drink evian, which was my Godfather’s influence considering he drank 1.5-3L of evian per day. No idea how much tennis sponsorship related merchandise we got from that, but they even have special water to spray on your face. WTF? Glad I got over that phase and sucked it up enough to drink tap water. Moving to Melbourne where the water actually tastes good probaly helped though. Never living without a water filter anywhere else, ever again!

If you care about your water or about the environment then you need to consider more than just taste. There’s flouride/chlorine/mineral/sodium content, bacterium, shipping carbon footprint, recylced plastics, chemical transfer, charity/cause donation scheme and god knows what else.  Get a proper reusable bottle that you can put in the dishwasher and clean properly, and then refill from the tap. It’s heaps cheaper too, that buying plastic bottles all the time.

Actually, I like looking at all the expensive wanky designs that water comes in now! Kind of just for a laugh because I don’t really understand how water became such a fashionable thing. You need to drink it so you don’t die, simple. Check these out, and yes, they are all water bottles. I mean come on guys…

My favourite at the moment is VOSS “Artesian water” because it’s just so over the top. Check out this spiel from their marketing people:
Packaging may often be the only differentiation when it comes to bottled water. VOSS Artesian Water boasts low levels of mineral content and dissolved solids, making it almost the closest you can get to pure H2O. Developed together with former creative director for Calvin Klein, Neil Kraft and his design team, it is obvious the inspiration for the brand and packaging was influenced by the luxurious cosmetic industry.

WANKERS!!! Are they for real? A fashion designed bottle of freaking water!? From Norway. I mean, I’m just really not sure the people in Africa who have to walk miles to a pump of dirty water are really going to appreciate that.
Also if you’re interested in the water debate, check out some of these sites for figures, facts and not-so-facts:
http://lighterfootstep.com/2008/05/five-reasons-not-to-drink-bottled-water/
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/enough-with-the-plastic-water-bottles-already.html
http://www.plasticsinfo.org/s_plasticsinfo/sec_level2_faq.asp?CID=705&DID=2839
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bottled_water
http://www.jhsph.edu/dioxins
http://thewaterproject.org/

Dating in Melbourne 3: How not to get the girl

So I’ve noticed some pretty strange behaviour lately in Singleland, and being a new resident I’m not really sure what to make of it. It seems to me that there’s a lot of people that need to have a sign held up in front of them that says DATING: You’re doing it wrong. And I’m not the only one that thinks so. Let me give you some clues about what might possibly be going wrong if you feel unsuccessful.

You’re not actually single. Seems like a no-brainer, doesn’t it? Well recently I’ve come across a two-timer, a three-timer, a short-term relationship cheater, a long-term relationship cheater, someone who is apparently no good at being honest in an “open” relationship, someone who thought it wouldn’t count because they were going to break up that weekend anyway (they didn’t) and people who think that kissing their friends in front of their partner when they’re drunk or high doesn’t count (it does). And I wonder why I’m jaded. I think I’ve done pretty well not falling into any of those categories since my last relationship started, knowing my past history.

You’re not giving off any signals. If you’re interested in someone but they have no idea about it even though you hang out regularly, then you’re just friends and it’s all your fault. If you’re waiting for them to make a move, then you’re going to be waiting a while. Don’t wait for people to make a move if you think they’re interested, just go for it. I’ll give you a hint – if they ask you out to hang one-on-one for stuff like dinner, movies, etc., bring you cupcakes, brush hands or make something for you I’d say they’re probably interested. If they don’t get any response then after a while they’re going to give up. Even the most confident person can be turned off by not getting a tell that they’re on the right track.

You’re giving off too many signals. Only texting someone after 10pm or texting them often even if you don’t get a response, saying unwarranted sleazy things to them, sending them flowers for no reason, buying them gifts, talking randoms into putting your number in their phone, trying to kiss people you’ve just met, getting pissed off when someone talks to other people or getting touchy when you’ve had no clue that they might be interested are all signs that you’re coming off a little bit too strong. Maybe you should ease up a little bit. There’s a balance between too strong and not strong enough and while confidence is extremely sexy, sleaziness is not.

You’re not trying hard enough. I have friends who are perfectly lovely people, attractive, funny, smart and single. They complain about not meeting the right sort of people, or only date people who are no good for them and then wonder why they’re not happy. It’s because they’re not trying hard enough. If you want to meet a certain type of person then you’re going to have to go to the places where they might be. If you just want to meet someone outside your friendship group, you’re going to have to start hanging out with people who (shock! horror!) aren’t your friends. Get a social hobby, volunteer for a charity, start going to gigs you want to go to without a massive group of friends etc. Don’t be afraid of online dating as a way to meet people, or via forums of your interests. Just so long as you meet in a safe, public place in daylight of course. But that sounds kind of creepy. Seriously, it’s fine. Give it a shot.

You’re too much effort. The full-calendar type don’t have room in their lives for dating. Someone that works a lot or works and studies or goes to the gym every night or has sporting committments all week/end or social events that you can’t work around isn’t going to be very much fun to date if you have to slot dinner in between other committments. I run the risk of this one quite often, and have struggled with taking on too much over the last few years, but if you want to be seeing people, then you make the time. If you don’t, then don’t complain about being single. If you like someone that’s always on the go, make it clear that you’re keen but if they don’t make the time for you, they’re not.

By the way… I can’t speak for all of the other girls out there but I can probably give a few clues about an appropriate course of action if you’re interested in someone. Ask them out for a coffee, drink or lunch, something nice and casual or mid-week. If you both have a good time, send them a timely message (none of this waiting 48 hours bullshit, if you like them then don’t wait until you go to sleep that night) for a follow-up. When you see them again, you always want it to be easy and fun, and not centred around yourself or your interests if you’re the one organizing it. If you like someone, when you’re comfortable and sooner rather than later, kiss them. Eventually, unless you’re holding off for religious or medical reasons, you should have sex with them. Try and avoid sleeping in the same bed with someone without anything happening, because that’s what friends and people in long-term relationships do. So that’s essentially my advice. Be single, let them know you’re keen without coming across too strong, get out there and do things you’re interested in to meet people, let people get to know you, have time for them and make some moves!!

Let’s get girly: Summer essentials

Look, I’m not that much of a girlie girl but I do appreciate quality products. I should be more careful with stuff like Crueltry Free products but generally I think I do okay. There are guides available that any person who wants to know can get their hands on easily. But these are my essential beauty products for Summer. What are yours?

Dry shampoo is my saviour. I have long hair and I only wash it every second or third day, so it can get a little bit oily and gross, especially when I’m going to the gym regularly - Batiste have an amazing range that you just spray in, let it soak for a minute and then brush through. It comes in a whole bunch of different scents – my favourite is Tropical.

Don’t bother with mascara if you’re going to be swimming a lot. Get your eyelashes tinted instead. If you do wear mascara it should always be a non-waterproof as the waterproof types will make your eyelashes fall out because of the wax and holding agents and if you do go swimming and they smudge a bit, it’s a lot harder to get off! My favourite mascaras have rubber bristles, for more even coverage.

Definitely use a lip balm that doesn’t have petroleum jelly in it, because that actually makes your lips crack and then you have to use a whole bunch more of it! I love love love Palmer’s Moisturizing Lipbalm, it’s the best one I’ve found ever since The Body Shop stopped making their honey lip balm. If you’re not vegan, then you might also like Burt’s Bees Lipbalm.

Palmers also do the most amazing fake tan body lotion called Natual Bronze which smells like chocolate. Seriously, a guy from work actually smelled my legs because it was so good! The colour is definitely natural, it develops quickly and evenly, comes in a handy pump bottle and yes, it smells divine. Lasts for a couple of days and leaves your skin feeling amazingly soft and moisturized.

Sunscreen is a must-have and a good face moisturizing/non-greasy broad spectrum one is hard to find. Invisible Zinc is the bomb. I always forget to use sunscreen unless it’s my moisturizer and they also have tinted moisturizer, staying powder, tinted lip & cheek balm and self tanner. It’s a little more expensive than the normal suncreens and stuff but it’s worth it.

After you’ve been in the sun, you’ll definitely want to cool down your skin, especially if you’ve been out there just a little bit too long. Keep a bottle of after sun cooling gel in your fridge, like Solarcaine. It’s pure heaven! I have to give the credit to my ex-boyfriend, Greg, for this one, it’s just pure genius and we always kept a bottle of it in the fridge.

The last thing you want is tampons kicking around in the bottom of your beachbag awkwardly. Moxie tampons come in the most adorable little tin, and were designed by the most lovely Melbourne lady to boot! The range includes tampons of all sizes, liners in cute tins, pads of different sizes and now, the thing I’ve most been waiting for: refull packs for the cute tampon tins! I actually considered designing my own and sending it to Mia to see what she thought but she beat me to it!

All of these products are available online, at Priceline or your local supermarket or pharmacy. All the images were sourced from the company websites where availble or from online stockists.
Check out www.moxie.com.au or follow @milliemoxette on Twitter for more info on the cutest feminine products ever!

Friday night drinks – edition 2

BarNone – cocktail specialists

If you’ve never been to BarNone, you are missing one of the greatest experiences of your life. Just near Camberwell station down a side street there is an unassuming door that you enter, go downstairs and through another door to walk into what looks like a cosy, possibly intellectual, definitely stylish person’s lounge room. Full of comfortable chairs and sofas, a projector screen and warm lighting you basically feel at home as soon as you sit down. The waiters present you with a book, otherwise known as the very extensive drinks menu and will provide impeccable table service all night. Not only does the cocktail list complete gobsmack, but BarNone has taken care to have quality wine, beer, ciders and snacks menus.  They even do great toasted sandwiches and my favourite novelty that I have yet to try is to purchase a whole bottle of spirits which they will look after for you for subsequent visits, providing all mixers except Red Bull for the duration of the consumption of the bottle. What a way to impress someone!
Their mission was ‘to create and serve only the finest drinks to a discerning crowd, who appreciate the quality of their drinks’. With such expertise behind the bar, they’ve hit the nail on the head with this one. You’d be hard pressed to find a higher quality cocktail, with BarNone and 1806 neck and neck, there’s no close competition for the boutique cocktail experience from any other bar, that I know of at least.
BarNone opened their function space in late October, on the third floor overlooking the Melboune city skyline. They run cocktail and food matching workshops, cocktail classes, private tastings, generous drink packages and are running Belgian Bier & Bratwurst on Sunday afternoons from mid-November in their courtyard.

My favourite BarNone cocktails: blurbs from the BarNone cocktail menu

Zombie
Created in the late 1930s by Donn Beach at The Beachcomber Restaurant.
RECCOMENDED: Beware: This drink contains 4 rums, 1 overproof rum, absinthe, marachino liqueur and velvet felernum. This is one of the most famous tiki drinks with the equivalent of 3.5 standard drinks!
Classic Sazerac
Created in 1853 by Antoine Amadie Peychaud at the Sazerac Coffeehouse, French Quarter, New Orleans
Served with Jim Beam Rye Whiskey
Hurricanes are for tourists. Sazeracs are for natives. This is without a doubt one of the greatest cocktails ever created. The layer upon layer of character and flavour are outstanding. But it is a strong and smooth drink, not some alcoholic fruit juice!
Cocktail With No Name
Created in 2005 by Michael Cotter at BarNone, Melbourne
This cocktail is already famous at BarNone! A combination of Finlandia Mango, Gabriel Boudier Peach Liqueur, Ruby red grapefruit juice, passionfruit pulp and fresh lime juice. Garnished with a lychee. This cocktail is a great combination of fruit flavours with tanginess from the passionfruit and sweetness from the peach.
Devout Rastafarian
Created in 2007 by Michael Carne at BarNone, Melbourne.
In 1962 Jamaica finally gained its independence from Britain. The following year tens of thousands of devout Rastafarians turned up for the reburial of one of the greatest men of the 20th Century, Marcus Garvey. Garvey, a Jamaican, was a huge leader of the ‘Back-to-Africa’ movement. Rastafarians consider Garvey a religious prophet. This beautiful cocktail, remembers the Jamaican legend. Freshly muddled peach with Appleton rum, lime juice, Gabriel Boudier Peach Liqueur and garnished with a slice of peach and a little Jamaican passion.

http://www.barnone.com.au – http://www.myspace.com/barnonecamberwell
Tue & Wed: 6pm – 12am, Thu, Sat: 6pm – 2am, Fri: 5pm – 2am, Sunday: 12pm – 11pm

If you can’t make it out to Camberwell in the short term, head down to 1806 on Exhibition Street in the CBD for a similarly impressive experience while you clear your schedule for a trip out East.

Organic Schmanic

I’m a little skeptical about Organic produce to be honest. I haven’t really found substantial evidence that buying Organic is worth it in Australia. Macro Wholefoods, my favourite supermarket (may it rest in peace), had a great Organic selection but for a few extra dollars a kilo when I’m a poor student it had to be really worth my while. Organic pears and tomatoes I always tried to buy, especially at Victoria Market. But when it comes down to it, what’s the point, all the fruit and vegetables look better, are cheaper and are more readily available when they’re not Organic…?

Why choose Organic: from organicangels.com
“Poison is not food: Who wants to knowingly eat poison? Well, those who are not taking organic foods seriously. Regular foods are sprayed with pesticides and other chemicals to keep the bugs from getting to them. But the toxic chemicals end up getting to you, and you find yourself suffering from inexplicable allergies and ailments. Organic foods hold much less metal content -aluminum, lead and mercury- than regular food. Aluminum has been linked to increased rates of Alzheimers disease, mercury to brain damage, and lead to poor IQs.
“Nurturing Mother Nature: When we switch to organic foods, we are silently sending Mother Nature a message that we care. Chemicals and pesticides are not just harmful to us; they also cause untold destruction on nature - they pollute the water we drink, they kill the natural habitats of animals, plants, birds and fishes, thereby poisoning them and driving them to extinction, and they make land totally worthless for farming or other life-sustaining activities.
“Getting back to our roots: Growing your own organic foods is the best way to go organic – you’re reducing your carbon footprint to the minimum. Even local produce and meat have to travel a certain distance to reach you, but your garden and your kitchen can be bridged by a few steps at the most. When you commune with nature in the most basic way, you feel at peace, both with yourself and the world. Gardening has been proven to have a therapeutic effect, and when it’s organic plants you’re growing, you have the added satisfaction of knowing you’re doing your best for your family and the environment.
“Giving your children a healthy legacy: Children are more susceptible to damage due to pesticide exposure because they have smaller organs, faster metabolisms, standard diets and speedy growths. When they’re encouraged to eat healthy organic food right from the time they can chew, you’re setting the stage for a fitter and better life ahead for them.
“More nutrition is better: Organic foods have been proven to have a higher nutritive content than their non-organic counterparts. They are richer in Calcium (for strong bones), Magnesium (good for the heart), Boron (prevents bone diseases), Lithium (treats depression), Selenium (an antioxidant) and Chromium (prevents diabetes and the hardening of arteries).”

 

Really? Maybe I’m just not taking it seriously then. Because whilst I know that fruits and vegetables that are in season taste better and carry more nutrients, which is also aided by better quality soil, I’m still not convinced. Why not just eat seasonally then? It would make food cheaper too, because it’s more readily available and doesn’t have to be trucked in from God knows where or been there for God knows how long. But is Organic really better for you?

 There’s been heaps of different studies on Organic foods. The major points of The French Agency for Food Safety study are:
1. Organic plant products contain more dry matter (more nutrient dense)
2. Have higher levels of minerals
3. Contain more anti-oxidants such as phenols and salicylic acid (known to protect against cancers,
heart disease and many other health problems)
4. Organic animal products contain more polyunsaturated fatty acids (protect against heart disease)
5. Carbohydrate, protein and vitamin levels are insufficiently documented
6. 94–100% of organic foods do not contain any pesticide residues
7. Organic vegetables contain far less nitrates, about 50% less (high nitrate levels are linked to a range
of health problems including diabetes and Alzheimer’s)
8. Organic cereals contain similar levels of mycotoxins as conventional ones

However, a study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, which is the most prestigous Nutrition Journal around, says nope, it doesn’t make a difference. The article has been quoted in many different sources since it was published in July this year. But that’s just one article from a reputable source, so who knows? Oh wait, the Food Standard Agency in the UK has an independent report saying there was no difference as well! Uncanny… but then of course, evidence from a $27million, four-year European Union study found organic fruit and vegetables contained between 20 and 40 percent more antioxidants. The research also found organic produce contained higher levels of vitamin C, antioxidants, beneficial minerals such as iron and zinc and substantially higher levels of compounds thought to boost health and combat disease. Okay guys, let’s all have a hug and decide which side we’re all on.

One thing that’s been bantered around heaps is the lists of what to buy if you’re going to prioritise buying Organic foods when the standard produce is going to be the most at risk of a problem…
12 most contaminated: Peaches, Apples, Sweet Bell Peppers, Celery, Nectarines, Strawberries, Cherries, Pears, Grapes (Imported), Spinach, Lettuce, Potatoes
12 least contaminated: Onions, Avocado, Sweet Corn (Frozen), Pineapples, Mango, Asparagus, Sweet Peas (Frozen), Kiwi Fruit, Bananas, Cabbage, Broccoli, Papaya
 OR from a different source…
 The Dirty Dozen (in order from most pesticide-ridden): Peach, Apple, Bell pepper, Celery, Nectarine, Strawberries, Cherries, Kale, Lettuce, Grapes (imported), Carrot, Pear. (Here’s the list for the 47 worst and their pesticide rating)
The Clean 15 (in order from least pesticide-ridden): Onion, Avocado, Sweet corn, Pineapple, Mango, Asparagus, Sweet peas, Kiwi, Cabbage, Eggplant, Papaya, Watermelon, Broccoli, Tomato, Sweet potato.

It’s safe to say that there is still a lot of debate about whether buying Organic foods is worth it or not but I reckon if you’re paranoid, poorly or pregnant, Organic is definitely the way to go. For the rest of us, I think we’ll be okay without.

Some more stuff to read if you’re interested in the topic:

http://blogs.creativeloafing.com/dailyloaf/2009/05/13/case-against-organic-food/
http://www.ofa.org.au/
http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/abstract/90/3/680
http://www.food.gov.uk/news/newsarchive/2009/jul/organic
http://www.organic.org